The Four Agreements Are Beneficial Principles We Can Utilize To Lead Our Lives, Improve Our Associations With Others, And Maximize Our Happiness.


Have you come across the book The Four Agreements? The Four Agreements by Ruiz are highly effective fundamentals we can use to lead our lives, improve our connections with others, and promote our happiness and health and well being.

These are Ruiz's The Four Agreements.

The First Agreement: Always be Impeccable With Your Word.

This means steering clear of gossip, falsehoods, empty pledges and other behaviors we bring about suffering with our words. Speak only what you intend, and realize that you can bring about damage if you're not judicious with each remark you state.

This is a beneficial advice. Many human beings don't realize the capacity of their words and see the impediment that can be produced with speaking recklessly, thoughtlessly or aggressively. Most people are aware that yelling at someone may be uncomfortable to them, but indirect little digs at them, or gossip at their backs, can negatively affect others more than we know, and in hurting them, we injure ourselves.

The Second Agreement: Don't Take Anything Personally.

This 'agreement' relates to getting familiar with how other people's attitudes are a mirror of them only. Whenever a person gives us feedback about us, it's necessary to remember that no feedbacks are absolutely objective; we all hold our biases, 'filters' through which we see the world, and the like. With this, we shouldn't take anyone else's perception of us or our actions as absolutely true; whenever an individual states something about us (or anything else), they're simply saying something about their very selves and how they view the world.

This is fantastic guide for making us feel better, but take it with a grain of salt. Even as everybody has their biases and there is no such thing as true objectivity, by not taking anything personally, people can actually limit their ability to perceive their own undesirable patterns and biased thinking, and work on forming more healthy patterns and clear-sighted thinking.

The Third Agreement: Don't Make Assumptions.

A great deal of stress is generated when people assume they know what other individuals are thinking without clarifying with them. Comprehending that other individuals might have unique motivations for their actions, even significantly varying world views, and bearing in mind to really try to understand others and exchange views about these motivations before jumping to conclusions with regards to their behavior, can go a long way toward discouraging interpersonal conflict.

Nevertheless, taking this pointer to an extreme may cause people to disregard their intuition about people, or common sense concerning someone's behavior that's damaging. It can also open people up to manipulation should they train themselves to believe an individual's explanation of bad behavior rather than judging the behavior on its own. (Example: not 'assuming' they're being cheated on if their partner is showing erratic behavior and the typical signs of cheating, but vehemently denies wrongdoing.) This one is a fantastic suggestion, but should be tempered by common sense and inner wisdom.

The Fourth Agreement: Always Do Your Best.

By this, Ruiz implies to do the best you can at any given time, and you'll never have regrets. Some days, your best is not as good as other days, and that is alright. As long as you put honest attempt into life, you will have nothing to be ashamed of, and will not 'beat yourself up' over a less-than-stellar execution in retrospect.

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